Have you ever thought of how differently your life would have turned out if you had just turned right instead of left? Or taken the job and left the old? Have you ever thought of the minor changes you make that make the major differences in your life?
My friends and I decided to do a project where we do exactly that. We have planned a “Time Line Making Day”, a day where we will get together and reflect on the pivotal moments in our lives that shaped who we are today. For instance:
It was a mid winter night in Los Angeles and I was 19. My girlfriend Teressa and I lived in an apartment complex that had a large pool right in the center. It was freezing for a Southern California evening, and like the spontaneous (and stupid? Maybe crazy?) 19-year-old kids we were, we decided it would be a good idea to jump into the pool. We made our way through the pool gate and teetered on the edge. Residents of the complex stood on their balconies to see if we would actually do it. And we did. (I was pretty scared, and Terresa would probably tell you I almost back out.) But we held hands and just jumped. Clothes and all.
I remember the cold of the water almost paralyzing as I was submerged, and the darkness of the water surrounding me. I remember seeing the lights of the apartments through the water’s surface beaming down through the wakes we made. I remember those things, but I no longer remember the fear. And what seemed like forever being in the depths of that pool, in reality, was only a minute.
This may not seem like a huge pivotal point to most people, but for us it was. You see, during that time in our lives we were living pretty broke. We wanted to pursue our dreams of dancing and acting in a large city, and for the most part, we were! But not without some (major) fear and hesitation. By jumping into the pool we wanted to remind ourselves that no matter how scared we were we still could jump into whatever we wanted to do. And so we did. Literally. So to this day, whenever something is scary; either she is wanting to make a move or I want to pursue a new path we tell each other to, “Jump into the pool”
When I make my timeline, I would mark this moment in my life as one of those times when I remembered who I was. It would be a marker on my timeline that reminded me to be spontaneous and not to fear anything, because fear is such a temporary feeling. There are many more important markers and pivot points to lead me to where I am today but I would mark this as a major one in my shift in thinking.
So I challenge you to think of your pivot points. What moments have you had, either big or small that have challenged you, or scared you? What moments in your life made you a better person or made you worse off? And remember that it is ok to remember when we were worse off. It makes you appreciate what you have now, that makes you better off!
I know its easy to forget the harder times, because, well, they were hard. But what if we looked at those hard times differently? What if we reflected on those hard moments and saw them as markers that changed us and challenged us for the better. Try making your timeline, see where you’ve been and how you ended up where you are today!
Here are a few things to consider when you make your own!
-What was the first decision you made, separate from decisions your parents have made for you?
-What was a pivotal moment in your childhood that you feel still stays with you as a formative moment or season today?
-Name a few significant moments that changed your life. (Marriage, birth, death, career change, etc) And WHY they changed your life or didn’t!
-Remember a time you were scared, but things worked out… and when they didn’t work out.
-Think about small things that have happened to you that you wouldn’t really consider being major but in reality they were.
-Name a few people who have influenced your life to go in a different direction and why!
The possibilities are endless! The main point is to remember where you’ve been, and how those moments made you, you. Maybe you are at a pivot point in your life currently, and faced with a decision to go either way, looking back might help you make a better decision.
Have fun, be honest with yourselves and be creative with your timelines! This is a reflection of your past that can help you form ideas for your future. Enjoy!
XO-Mimi
Mimi B.C. 