#Momprobs.

New meanings moms (and dads) would give to otherwise mundane terminology. 

1. Dinosaur Books: Bounded pages filled with unpronounceable words like: Nothronuchus or Yangchuanosaurus (seriously, what happened to the easy ones like T-reX? Or Long Neck?), that make me sound like I can’t read. And ultimately make story time a million times longer then it has to be.

2.Limbo: That place you are in after the kids are in bed and you need to decide whether you will clean the house, or just fall asleep.

3. Purgatory: That other place that happens when you are tired all damn day and its finally bedtime. Your kids fall asleep, and suddenly you aren’t tired anymore. (!&#%&!*! I know you’re feeling me on this one mom’s and dads out there.)

4.Barista: Your Best friend at 7:00 AM, 2:00 PM and sometimes even 6:00PM

5.Bartender: Your other BFF who you often see when you really need a break typically at 7:00 AM, 2:00PM and 6:00PM…hey. Its always 5 o’clock somewhere right? I don’t judge.

6. Wine: Magical elixir that breathes life into you when you feel like you just. can’t. even. anymore  and…..usually crying ugly tears.

7. High Heels: What are those? Those pokey devil tools that make me walk like a drunk puppy?

8. Bathroom Break: That place you go to hide from your family.

9. Eating Right: What happens when you are trying to diet but McDonalds is on the right hand side of the road. Thats eating, right?

10. Dressing up: What I do when I drop my son off for preschool to make other people think I have it together.